Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

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Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Wed Jul 04, 2012 11:43 am



This is the galaxy. It’s a pretty cool place. There are billions of suns and billions and billions of planets.

Some of them have life.

A few of them have intelligent life-forms.

Some of them have functional civilizations.

Some of these civilizations have spaceships; they use them to bother lesser-developed cultures with intimate medical experiments.

But when you’re at the bottom of a puddle of primordial ooze, the stars seem pretty far away. Can the descendants of a lone micro-organism change the course of the galaxy?

There are five stages in Spore: each one simulates a different phase in the planet’s history; from tide pool microbes to an interstellar, space-faring civilization. Each decision you make in the game affects your race’s development. Past choices will influence how NPCs treat you, and offer you discounts or advantages in using certain tools. If you’re herbivorous, friendly to your fellow creatures, and pursue a philosophy of peace, you will evolve into a race of space-hippies that lounge around all day, smoking intergalactic marijuana and staring at their fingers/wings/exoskeleton/tentacles.

On the other hand, if we decide to nurture a race that likes to kill, plunder, destroy, and pillage indiscriminately, then we will eventually wind up with a race that likes to blow up said space-hippies.

Naturally, it’s possible to mix and match certain traits and wind up as other archetypes; but I’ll leave our specie’s cultural development up to you as we play through the game.



This is our planet. Again, it’s a pretty nice place to live. For the first four phases of the game, we’ll be restricted here, but in the space phase we’ll be able to colonize or invade other planets to extend our empire. But our home world will still be the hub of our empire, and so it needs a cool name. Because you can’t make a race of aliens without giving their home planet a cool name. Oh, and we'll also need to come up with an equally cool name for our species. One that will hopefully inspire fear in our enemies; or at the very least, inspire extreme derision, to the point that we can swoop in and blow up their city while they're laughing at us.

We will also have to make one crucial decision, that will likely affect our entire civilization’s history.



Will we be a herbivore…



… or a carnivore?
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Ud the Imp on Wed Jul 04, 2012 11:45 am

Choose herbivore. Wanna see what a space faring civilization based on plant eaters looks like.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Doctor Thunder on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:07 pm

It would mean we'd need to diplomacy things to death, rather than just conquer them. Let's go with a carnivore, and as for the design, I'm going to go ahead and preemptively vote for a penis monster. Playing this game any other way is just objectively incorrect. =P

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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Ud the Imp on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:10 pm

@Thunder: What about a species of herbivores that's still a conqueror race? I mean, rhinos and hippos are both herbivores, and yet they are NEVER known to be non-violent.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Doctor Thunder on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:13 pm

I'm not sure if you can be non-violent as an herbivore once you get to the space portion of the game. As in, I seem to remember the game not letting you do that. If you can, though, I'll change my vote to that.

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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:19 pm

Herbivores and peaceful empires can still arm their ships with weapons, and if you really want you can commit genocide, invade other planets, etc.

You just might not be as good at it as an aggressive warrior race.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  The Bountiful Cock Tree on Wed Jul 04, 2012 12:41 pm

Start as a herbivore, find something with a proboscis and magically develop the ability to eat meat after you kill it. Spore has the best idea of natural selection.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Megafire on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:18 pm

Can 'omnivore' be an option?
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:22 pm

You can become an omnivore midway through the cell stage, but to begin with you either eat meat or plants.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Ud the Imp on Wed Jul 04, 2012 1:30 pm

Begin with plants, and then when the suckers ain't looking, GO ALL YOU CAN EAT BUFFET ON THEIR ASSES!!! Twisted Evil
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Wed Jul 04, 2012 2:49 pm

Keep in mind that we still need a name for our species and our home planet.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Doctor Thunder on Wed Jul 04, 2012 3:30 pm

After consulting with my cousin, the master of Spore, the planet should be called Cockshine, and it should be inhabited by the proud and noble Cockshiners.

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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  The Bountiful Cock Tree on Wed Jul 04, 2012 3:40 pm

I agree with this most illustrious proposition.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Aken Jizo on Wed Jul 04, 2012 3:42 pm

Start as carnivore and give yourself a herbivores mouth when you can so we can eat all the things. Omnivores get the best mouths in creature stage. Our species should be either the Steve or the Spode and our planet should be called Holy Terra.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Dr. Keith Fetus on Wed Jul 04, 2012 4:03 pm

Carnivores, of course! We need to be aggressive if we want to survive! And then, turn into omnivores, and consume all!
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Kiri Ame on Thu Jul 05, 2012 5:34 am

I support carnivore/later omnivore, just because I spent most of Spore being a herbivore and running away from literally everything in terror. The end result was a race of very cowardly pink-and-purple cyclops bird space hippies, and although that was fun at the time, I'd kind of like to see how things go if we don't have to be terrified of everything.

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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  The Bountiful Cock Tree on Thu Jul 05, 2012 8:44 am

I'd like to point out that it's still entirely possible to be a herbivore and still give yourself a fuckload of weapons and kill everything to death. You just have no sane reason to, and therefore get to be a race of massive assholes. Very Happy
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Ud the Imp on Thu Jul 05, 2012 11:21 am

Or, in Loco's case, a race of bird cyclops people so scared of everything that they create WMDs for the sole purpose of preemptively blowing the shit out of everyone because they're afraid the targets may blow them up first. Laughing
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Thu Jul 05, 2012 11:54 am













Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari, Part I: And the Cockshiners Descended From the Heavens



Welcome to stage one of our grand evolutionary journey. Our tide pool is basically a tutorial stage for later parts of the game; it teaches us how to move, how to eat/hunt, and, most importantly, allows us to choose our lifestyle (herbivore, carnivore, omnivore). This is the only stage in which we're allowed to change our mouthparts at will. We're herbivorous for the moment, but seeing as how most people want an omnivorous lifestyle, we'll alternate between eating plants and meat so that we can unlock the omnivore mouths in the Creature stage.



There are other microbes here in the tide pool, too. Since we're herbivores for the moment, we can't interact with them much, but they are potential competitors for our food. The gameplay isn't too difficult; it's basically a fluid version of Pacman. Although there aren't any power pills. I wish there were, though.



As we eat food (the green dots floating around the screen) we gradually grow larger. Those little pink specks? Those are the microbes that were previously trying to eat our food supply. The bigger we grow, the more creatures we'll encounter. And we'll encounter more predators and competitors. Compared to all the other guys in the tidepool, we're pretty slow and defenseless at the moment.



New parts for us!

This is exactly how natural selection works, guys. Our ancestors just swam over corpses in the ocean, looted their corpses, and grafted dead body parts onto themselves.



Anyways, now that we have a shiny new pair of spikes in our genetic arsenal, let's enter the editor.



First, we need to attract a mate with our handy mating call, and then we get to watch some hot n' raunchy microbe sex.

Awwwww yeah.

Cool



And this is the editor. All the food that we've eaten previously is converted into DNA points for us to use in this editor. This limits the amounts of new parts that we can give our creature at a time. 12 DNA points is just enough to buy us a pair of spikes.



We can also change the profile of our microbes, although hydrodynamics isn't something that we need to worry about.e



Some spikes for us. Let's also switch over to a carnivorous mouth for now, to keep us on an omnivorous path.



Lookin' good. And we've named our race. Everything we make in the game is automatically uploaded onto the internet, and certain words or parts of words are automatically flagged. If I get flagged, then my game is automatically locked for a certain period of time, and I can't access it. So hopefully this is a good compromise. :p



Let's paint this guy up. We can choose our skin color and skin patterns here; we'll have far more variety in the creature stage. For now, let's go with orange. I like orange.



Generation two of the cockshiners are ready to be unleashed into the tidepool. Tune in later today for more Spore adventures!
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Doctor Thunder on Thu Jul 05, 2012 12:31 pm

Make sure to take notes on all the hard science going on in this LP, guys. There's going to be a test at the end; a Cockshiner test.

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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Aken Jizo on Thu Jul 05, 2012 2:03 pm

Spoiler:
Suddenly I know where Prometheus got all its SCIENCE from.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  GameGuru on Thu Jul 05, 2012 5:30 pm

Spoiler:
Well, you've got to admit that the Xenomorphs are the ultimate penis monster.
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Thu Jul 05, 2012 5:42 pm



Our sojurn through the predator-infested tidepools of the mysterious planet Cockshine continues. The second generation of our race is just about to emerge from his egg. What strange new creatuers will he meet in the primordial slime of this planet?



Say hello to generation two of the cockshiners!



We've lost a bit of flexibility by switching to a predatory mouth. There aren't as many meat bits floating around as there are seaweed bits; we have to chase our food down now for the most part. On the other hand, by killing cells we can get parts faster, so we can rack up DNA pretty quickly and evolve rapidly.

This is how evolution works. Darwin was totally wrong.



Another new feature in this part of the game is the presence of giant cells. They're huge, invincible, and they will chase you down and eat you if you get too close.



Fortunately for us, though, our brave little cockshiner managed to escape him, hunted down a few more unlucky creatures, and...






... managed to turn the tables.





After some more hunting and killing, though, we managed to unlock a new part! The "Jet" organ is probably one of the best mobility organs in this stage of the game; it makes you extremely fast, though at the cost of some maneuverability.



Things also get a bit more complex here with the arrival of fully-developed seaweed plants. If you're a herbivore, you can probably get 20-30 DNA off of these plants. We're carnivorous at the moment, but we can hang around the seaweed and run (swim?) down any unwary herbivores instead.



Shocked

oh shi-



After a bloody death that I forgot to take a picture of, we bravely respawn and continue chasing down animals that are much smaller than us.



We also manage to kill an animal with cilia; these work perfectly with the jets, as they provide maneuverability at the cost of speed. Let's see what we can evolve onto our species now...







Those microbes are masterful love-makers. Let's tamper with their baby's genes.



We only have enough DNA for either jets or cilia; I'll put on cilia as soon as I get enough money. To continue our journey towards an omnivorous future, we'll switch back to a herbivorous lifestyle.



Generation three of the Cockshiners is go!
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Aken Jizo on Fri Jul 06, 2012 12:04 am

SPOILER ALERT THE COCKSHINERS ARE THE ORIGINAL GREAT OLD ONES
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Re: Locoman's Splendiferous Spore Safari

Post  Locoman on Fri Jul 06, 2012 6:44 pm

The Cockshiners were, the Cockshiners are, and the Cockshiners shall be. Not in the spaces we know, but between them. They walk serene and primal, undimensioned and to us unseen.


-H.P. Lovecraft



We continue our journey through the tidepool. We're about halfway through the cell stage now.



With every growth spurt, the game starts throwing more and more spiny prey animals and giatn unkillable cells at you; they're all intent on making your life a living hell. In "Hard" mode, you can expect to die every two minutes or so. Fortunately for us, this is normal difficulty. Hunting will become much harder for us now; so we may have to switch back to herbivorousness(?).





A new part! This is the electricity generator part. Although it's supposedly the best defensive organ, it's actually pretty mediocre. It generates an electrical field of some kind that protects you for a few seconds from attack, but it alternates and you can still die while you're re-charging, so to speak.



After some swimming, and eating, we find a meteor fragment. The game only gives you meteor fragments if you don't kill an animal to get its parts; for herbivores, it's basically the only way to get parts at all.



Poison gland! The poison gland creates a stream of purple that injures/kills any cell that gets in your wake, making it ideal for evading pursuers. However, it also makes you weak to Psychic and Ground oh wait wrong game.



We continue to chomp our way through the ocean, and grow bigger in the process.



That black stuff isn't cell poop, fortunately; they're eggs. If we had a carnivore mouth, we could eat them for a significant amount of DNA. However, they do quickly hatch into aggressive little bastards, so you have to kill them before they do that.



AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-



We're really not well-adapted for this part of the game. But first...

Cool



After some tweaking, we have generation four of the Cockshiners, now equipped with poison. As a bonus, it makes us immune to the poison of others, which the NPC cells spam constantly in this bit of the game. We're also carnivores again, to keep us on the path to omnivorousness.



Now we can spray liquid death everywhere, and nobody can stop us.



That big blue thing is the creature that lays eggs. If we follow her (or him, maybe?) around for a little while, we can get a lot of DNA until we grow again, after which point we can eat him/her/schkler.



And so we continue through the wilds of planet Cockshine, eating eggs and unfortunate little creatures with wild abandon, rapidly accumulating DNA, until...



... ta-da! We've got ourselves a brain!



It's a tiny and rudimentary brain, to be sure; at this point the Cockshiners can only enjoy reality TV. However, a few billion years of evolution should change that.



Let's get ready to enter into the Creature stage.



Welcome to the Early Creature Editor! This editor is a bit odd; it's basically a stripped-down version of the creature creator with cell parts instead of the normal parts. However, the most important thing here si that we can slap on a pair of shiny new legs, grow some new-fangled lungs, and take a stroll on yonder beach. We can also adjust our posture and other aesthetic things right now.



Lookin' good.



We also have some more paint options.



The Cockshiners are ready to take an enormous evolutionary leap, to go where no cockshiner has ever gone before, to conquer that sun-baked terrain above known as "dry land". Will they suceed?



And now, good people of The Aristocrats, we must decide on what will happen to our noble race once they set foot on land. How will they develop? Will they suceed in making the leap to sentience?
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